Saturday, October 11, 2008

love?

although both of us are in the same institution, we’ve barely seen each other. i kinda miss you. a lot actually. now that we’re in the final-exam-period, the probability to accidentally meet each other is relatively small. not even one, I guess.

i know u had your computer class on thursday. after my biology class ended at 4, i always tried to find ways to see you. most of the times i dragged my friend, kyra to walk past the stad office just to have a glance at you walking to the computer lab. i had no idea whether you spot me in the middle of the people or not but one thing for sure, i walked back feeling satisfied and longed to see you again the next thursday.

during ramadhan, i love the feeling of anticipation whether you might be in the bazaar or not. at times our eyes met while walking on the same path, i recognize a glint of smile in your eyes. sometimes when you stroll along and laugh with your friends, i turned my head quickly to avoid your gaze. i pretended not to see you but deep down inside, i need to see your smiling face again. to make sure i can have a look at you, i went to the bazaar everyday. and you don’t disappoint me either. except for saturday and sunday, you were there each time i silently wish for you to appear.

i had this feeling that you are not gonna have a look at me even once considering the fact that you are tall, fair-looking, lean and handsome vs me, a little plain jane, neither gorgeous nor pretty and so totally the opposite of you. yeah, i got nothing to offer to you, im not an urban girl, im not rich, i’m not intelligent.. im just nobody. that’s just the painful truth i have to accept.

i realise both of us are from two different worlds apart. you are heading to gombak campus for your ict course, while im in kuantan studying medic. i even don’t know if this is your last semester here.. see? i know nothing about you. i don’t even know your full name, but people call you s***** - i know that. nothing else but only that. ironic, is it?

argh, i had this despair mood over me already. better i stop now. for mr.S, good luck to you. consider this fact: i’m an expert in tackling the love mystery among my friends, but i’ve got zero power to solve my own puzzle. haha. i.am.so.pathetic, don’t you think so?

who's gonna help me now? not you, for sure.

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